Kenny waits by the dumpster
for a couple of bucks&
john 3:16 hope

Susan Beth Furst
November 2015


I have kept this poem since 2015, the year I started to write haiku. I have sent it out a few times, but it was never accepted for publication. Maybe it is just a well. The poem is about a friend I haven't seen in a long time. He used to stand in his spot, in the Walmart parking lot, and I would drive by with some dollar bills and a Jesus Pen or a gospel. Kenny was always happy to see me. We would talk about things, and he would hug me through the car window. He called me his angel. What he didn't know, was that he was my angel.

Then one day Kenny wasn't there anymore. I asked his friends but no one knew where he was. Eventually I just stopped asking. But I never forgot him, Kenny. If he is still alive I hope he is doing well. If not, I think he is in heaven, looking down on me, or maybe he is having too much fun, exploring the universe with Jesus by his side.

"Don't forget to show hospitality to strangers, for some who have done this have entertained angels without realizing it!"
Hebrews 13:2 NLT

Life is funny, you're here and then you're not. People come and go and it is never easy when they leave, especially when they die. 

Albert Finney died yesterday. I loved him, even though I had never met him. I love his movies, especially Scrooge. It is one of my all time  favorites. I remember my parents dragging me and my sisters kicking and screaming to the movie theater. I was fifteen and I didn't want to be seen with my mom and dad at the movies on a Friday night. But I got over it real fast. The movie was Brilliant! The music was Brilliant! Albert Finney was Brilliant!

One of my favorite lines from the movie is strangely appropriate on the occasion of his passing.

"Remember Scrooge, Time is short, and suddenly you're not there, anymore!"
The Ghost of Christmas Present

We would all do well to remember that.


For Albert Finney, I shall miss you...

That night
at the movie theatre
Thank you very much...



One last thing. The Hope.

"For God so loved the world that he gave his only Son, so that everyone who believes in him will not perish but have eternal life."
John 3:16 NLT

The New Living Translation of the Bible is very readable and easily understood. I highly recommend it!

Until next week...

Hopefully,


Susan 

;)

PS  Check out "Life Poems," on this blog. I am open for submissions of haiku, haibun, or short poems which celebrate the inherent value of life, inside and outside of the womb. Guidlines are on the Life Poems Page. Thank you!

Susan

Gagged

One day, they just stopped
playing it.
Then they took it off the shelves.
I found it forty years later,
in a bin
in the back
of a used record store.
I play it
in the dark,
very softly,
like cats
feet...
disappearing
in
the
f
o
g

unborn child
spinning the sound
of silence


In 1974 Seals and Crofts recorded the song, Unborn Child. It spoke about abortion. One day the radio stations stopped playing it. When I looked for it in the record store I couldn't find it. It was boycotted, I would say banned. It disappeared overnight and the voices supporting life were silenced.  

My heart has been heavy this week. The news of the abortion bill, passed in New York, and the one introduced in Virginia, took me back to my senior year in high school. It was 1973, the year Roe v Wade became law. I couldn't understand how we as human beings could sanction the taking of human life in the womb. I don't understand it now, especially now. We've come a long way, and in the wrong direction.  

I have been silent all of these years. It is time to speak. I am coming out. I am pro-life. That's all. No lecture. No sermon. Just the Good News. Jesus loves you and so do I.



We are special:

"For you formed my inward parts, you knitted me together in my mother's womb. I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made."
Psalm 139: 13 ESV

"Before I formed you in the womb I knew you..."
Jeremiah 1: 4 ESV


We are sinners:

"For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God."
Romans 3: 23 NIV


We can be forgiven:

If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness."
1 John 1: 9 NIV

The Gift:

"For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life."
John 3: 16 NIV

Jesus is the gift. It is up to you, only to open your heart, and believe.

 My Sin Story...

Jesus came into my life when I was very young. I can't remember a time when I did not know him. I was eight years old. My family was on vacation and we were attending church. But this church was a little different than my Lutheran, Jesus loves me, all is well with my soul, church, (not that there's anything wrong with that). The pastor was praying and we all had our heads bowed. The pastor asked if anyone had ever sinned...

Well, yes...

"But I already know Jesus," I thought.

Yes but...

"But they are little sins, surely I'm not that bad..."

Um Hmm...

Then the pastor said that everyone would have their eyes closed, so no one would see if anyone raised their hand.

Well, I started to feel a little bit more comfortable with the idea of admitting that I was a sinner, and God already knew that if I didn't raise my hand I would be telling a lie, so...

My hand shot up like a bat out of, well you know...

What happened next is something that everyone who is, or ever was, a member of a Baptist church is familiar with.

The Great I Gotcha!!

The Pastor, the one who assured me that if I raised my hand everyone would have their eyes closed, neglected to tell me that if I raised my hand, I would also be called up to the front of the church, and everyone would have their eyes very much opened. 

Mom gave me a look...

Dad walked up with me. I remember him telling the pastor that I already knew Jesus, but I got a packet of papers or something, anyway,

as a souvenir...

I tell you this story because it was the first time I remember ever admitting that I was a sinner.

And it felt good.

I think the pastor may have had to admit a little sin (of omission) that day too.

Everyone sins. We can't help ourselves. It's in our DNA.

But the day you meet Jesus, the Son of God, the one who took your sin on his back, so that you could live with him forever. That is a happy day.

A Happy Day Indeed!!


Hopefully,



Susan

"We all die," she told herself, "sooner or later."
 And she cried.
"The sharp colors hurt my eyes,"
The jade plant leaned toward the window, to suck up all the light, leaving a soft amber glow in          the shadows.
​"Perhaps that is where the healing is," she thought, "perhaps it has been there all along."

I lost a friend yesterday. Although we had never met, I knew her through her poetry and the pictures that she colored when she was depressed. She called it color therapy. Rachel was a kind and sensitive person. Her poetry was beautiful and hopeful, and her pictures were too. I am sad when I think that I won't see them anymore.

grey morning
I look for the colors
​you left behind


Death sucks...

So what do you do with that hole in your heart?


"But he was pierced for our transgressions, he was crushed for our iniquities; the punishment that brought us peace was on him, and by his wounds we are healed."
Isaiah 53:5 NIV

Jesus was, is, and always will be our healer. He heals us physically, emotionally, and spiritually. He healed us when He lived among us, He healed us when He died on a cross bearing our sin as His own, and He healed us once and for all when He said "It is finished." 


Jesus was buried, but not for long. On that third day, He rose again. His tomb was and is still empty! And we, as believers, will live again!

And no, the disciples did not steal his body, do you think they could have fought off a Roman guard and rolled a two ton stone away from the grave, and then carried a dead body with one hundred pounds of embalming spices without anyone seeing them, ...to where?

They thought that it was the end when Jesus died, they didn't know he was gonna get back up out of that grave.

They were wanted men, a threat to the religious establishment, a threat to the Roman empire...

All they wanted to do was fade into the woodwork and go back to fishing...

But Jesus had other plans...

"I am the resurrection and the life. He who believes in Me, though he may die, he shall live. And whoever lives and believes in Me shall never die. Do you believe this?"
John 11:25-26 NKJV

​That is the question...

​What about the Jade plant? Take a close look. It has seen better days. It is scarred and beaten and yet it has life. And just as it sucked up all of the light producing a place of healing, a soft amber glow, so does Jesus. The one who was, and is, and is to come. The one who is eternal.

​
So be happy! When death comes knocking at your door, and you can be sure that he will, spit in his eye. Because Jesus came to Save, and when you believe in Him you will live forever!

For Rachel

freedom
dancing with colors
I can only imagine



Until next week,


hopefully,


Susan


:)

PS Oh death, where is your sting?

"Keith, man?
Didn't I tell you?
Anytime, anywhere
all you gotta do is call


Nothing can separate us from the love of God!
Romans 8

Jesus
hangin' out with
the usual suspects

In the most unlikely places

I Am



I saw this in the grocery store last night. Keith Richards on the magazine rack and Jesus less than a yardstick away. I knew I had been given a gift, so I grabbed my camera and started taking pictures. There was a haiku in there somewhere. 

It came to me fast, the imaginary conversation between Keith and Jesus. Actually the conversation was pretty much one-sided, but when God speaks, it is usually polite to just be quiet and listen. And what did Jesus say?

"I am here, even if you can't see me because I'm three magazines to your left, and we are both facing forward." (Of course Jesus can see everything, all the time, but that's neither here nor there). "Just call me, Keith! When you are ready! I can hear you, even without a phone!"

Of course I'm joking...

Sort of...

Jesus is everywhere, all the time, 24/7. And he is ready to listen. Really, all you have to do is call. A simple, "Jesus help!" 

And you don't even have to speak. He knows your thoughts. But don't worry, there are a lot of people who have worse thoughts than you. In fact when it comes to bad thoughts we are all pretty much in the same trash can.

Jesus came to save us.

That is what He wants us to know.

So, if the world is getting a little heavy on your shoulders,

If life seems crazy and you wonder why you are here,

Ask the one who knows.

He will show you the straight path. It's really not so bad. In fact once you are on it, you won't want to leave.

Jesus loves you!

Bad thoughts and all! 

He is here to take them, and then some!

All you have to do is call!


Oh, the usual suspects...

Jesus came to save the lost, the sick, and the broken. That is all of us, even those who seem to have it all together. Jesus knows, remember what I said about him knowing your thoughts...

Jesus was notorious for hanging out with alcoholics, junkies, working girls, the IRS people, even Kings and higher-ups in the government. He also hung with average joes, women :o , and children. And last but not least, the religious leaders of the day. 

And if you're telling the truth, we all fit in at least one of those categories.

So, If you need help, he's waiting...


hopefully,


Susan

​;)

"For God so loved the word that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life."

John 3:16

​PS This is really good news...

​sick bed
Jesus in the room
I count my blessings


rockin' pneumonia
covered in prayer&
three blankets


day nine / new year's pneumonia


I've been sick in bed with pneumonia for almost two weeks now. New Year's Day it hit me. No warning. Within a few hours, a cough, chills, and a fever. Blindsided. And I had so many plans. I was ready this year. Ready to get my doctors in order, my writing in order, my house in order...

What do you do? Nothing. Really. I could barely keep my eyes open.

The first week was a blur. Day eight, I had a thought about what I wanted for breakfast. Improvement. Day thirteen, I am up and dressed (Pajama casual), cooking (instant oatmeal), writing   (a little), and watching a bit of TV. I still have trouble keeping my eyes open.

The thing is that I should've/could've gotten my pneumonia shot last year. My doctor highly recommended it, in fact he insisted, but I said no, for good reasons I might add, which I'll not go into here.

"I'll never get pneumonia," I thought.

The best-laid plans...

(Robert Burns is my new favorite poet)

So what do you do when there is nothing you can do?

What I haven't mentioned about being sick with pneumonia for two weeks is that I was really afraid. I was afraid that I would never get well, or that maybe I would die. I am almost 64 years old you know, stranger things have happened. 

When fear takes over, your imagination can run wild, and not in a good way. 

So what do you do?

I turn to the Word.

Why? 

Because Jesus knew that Satan uses fear to attack people. In fact, He was always telling people, his disciples mostly, not to be afraid.

There was the incident when Jesus was walking on the water and Peter and company thought He was a ghost!

Fear can paralyze. Fear can torment. Fear can keep you stuck in a place you don't want to be. Fear can keep you from getting well.

Jesus came to set us free from fear. He is stronger than fear. He is stronger than anything Satan can throw at you. Including pneumonia... 

So when I am afraid I let go of that fear and Freefall. I imagine God's hands stretched out underneath me and I know he will catch me. He hasn't missed yet! 

"The spirit of the Lord is on me, because he has anointed me to proclaim good news to the poor. He has sent me to proclaim freedom for the prisoners and recovery of sight for the blind, to set the oppressed free..."

Luke 4: 18

There is something about Jesus announcing good news to the poor and freedom to the prisoners, recovery of sight for the blind and the lifting of the oppressed. Jesus can do it. Jesus did it and he does it today. All you have to do is open you hand and take the gift of freedom and life that He offers.

"For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life."

John 3:16

​Have a good week!


hopefully,

Susan


PS Luke 4:18 was written especially for me. I know this because my birthday falls on April 18. Not a coincidence. What is your birthday verse?  ;)

​
​

Stargazers
an appointment
in Bethlehem

midwinter moon: a collection of Christmas haiku
​By susan beth furst


January 6th is the day Christians around the world celebrate the Feast of the Epiphany,

Wise men came from the east to Jerusalem asking where the King of the Jews was to be born, because they had seen his star in the sky and had come to worship him. King Herod let them in on an ancient Jewish prophecy; that Jesus was to be born in Bethlehem. But Herod had ulterior motives. He asked the wise men to return to him when they found Jesus so that he could worship him too. Of course worship was not what King Herod had in mind for this new little threat to his throne.

The wise men continued their journey to Bethlehem and when they found the baby Jesus it was revealed to them that he was not only King of the Jews, but King of all mankind. Jesus was God Incarnate. It was also revealed to them not to return to Herod for he wanted to kill the child and so they departed another way to their own countries.

Matthew Chapter 2

That's it in a nutshell! Epiphany is all about revelation. In this case a revelation of God sized proportions!

January 6th is special for another reason. It was the day my husband and I met for the first time, at IHOP. Today is the eleven year anniversary of that meeting. I learned many things that day. Herb's mother and my mother had the same birthday. He also had the same first name of my favorite Uncle, Herb.

How many Herbs do you know?

I learned other things too. Herb's mom was from Poland and his dad was from Latvia. They were both holocaust survivors... 

Well, it was an auspicious night, and eleven years and ten years of marriage later, we are still learning things.

This morning, I realized that our anniversary and Epiphany were on the same date. This was a revelation to me. I wanted to know if Epiphany fell on January 6th every year, so I did a little research, and yes it does.

January 6th is now officially Epiphany and The Furst's First Date Day.  

So what about the dog barking?

I learned that in Latvia, if you hear a dog bark on Epiphany Day and look in the direction of the dog, you will see your future spouse.

Hmmmm, I might be stretching it a bit, but it was on Epiphany Day that I first saw my future spouse. We were at IHOP, not the one in Latvia of course, and there weren't any dogs around, but....

Just one more thing. As I said I am a Lutheran Christian and my husband is a Jewish believer. I was baptized, born and raised in the Lutheran church. Actually, I was born in Shadyside hospital, but it was very close to the Lutheran church. Herb went to Hebrew school, was bar mitzvah'd  at thirteen, and attended synagogue.

But he was born in Baltimore Lutheran Hospital...

Prophetic?

Perhaps,
​
Or maybe it was just meant to be...

Happy Epiphany!

hopefully,

​Susan

 The Princess and the Pearl: A Cautionary Haibun
 
Lily’s father took her to the Oyster House every Saturday. They sat at the small tables, on wobbly chairs, and ordered oysters and buttermilk. Lily liked hers with hot sauce and vinegar. She liked her buttermilk with three shakes of black pepper. Vintage photos of Miss America contestants lined the wall behind them. Boozy old men sat at the bar drinking beer and shots of whiskey.
 
     funnel clouds on the horizon spinning shades of gray
                            
 
One Saturday, Lily had a feeling that something extraordinary was going to happen.
“Perhaps this will be the day that I find my pearl,” she thought.
When the waiter brought the oysters to the table, Lily couldn’t decide which one to choose. So, she closed her eyes, made a wish, and picked the fat one on the right. She sank her teeth into the vinegar-laced breading. As it melted on her tongue, she felt something hard scrape against her tooth. Holding her breath and being very careful not to swallow, she extracted a rather large oddly-shaped yellow pearl.
“I found it! I found my pearl!” Lily squealed.
 
      free fall she steps into her red high heels
 
Lily’s father let out a loud laugh and the boozy old men turned and stared. The Miss Americas stared back. The bartender came out from behind the bar, drying his hands on his dingy white apron. He looked at the pearl and held it up to inspect it.
“I’ve never seen a pearl quite this color before,” he announced, as he buffed it with his dish rag. “And it’s so large and bumpy. I’m sure there’s not another one like it! You must have it made into a ring!”
 
                              the wizard behind the curtain smoke and mirrors
                                                                                                                                               
Suddenly the bar came alive. There were oohs and ahs from the old men. The bartender puffed out his chest. And everyone was talking about Lily and her pearl. She felt like a Princess. The Miss Americas continued to stare from the back wall. They knew what it was like to be a princess, to find your pearl and to lose it. But Lily was too young and too excited to notice them. She was too busy thinking about that ring and how she was going to find her Prince.
                             
                               still searching somewhere along the yellow brick road
 
  

by Susan Beth Furst
The Fredericksburg Literary & Art Review Spring & Summer 2018

How is your Sunday? I hope you are taking time to rest and relax. When God created the world he set aside a day to rest, not because he needed it, but for us. It is a tough world out there so I hope you will take this time to rest and enjoy your family and the day. 

A scripture of hope should you need some;

For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only son that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life.
John 3:16
​in my own words....

Something in the water
A Jewish transport arrives at Stutthof concentration camp. Down the road is the popular resort town of Krynica Morska. Families untouched by the Nazi nightmare splash in the waters of the Baltic Sea, oblivious.
 
holiday
at the beach                 she says goodbye
gentle waves               to her father at Auschwitz
 
Wetlands and beautiful pine forests, spotted with silver-birch and oak, surround the electric barbed-wire fences of Stutthof. Inside the fences typhus runs rampant.
 
two leaves
on a branch                  her friend says
white ash                     ‘I will be your sister now’
 
Just days before Liberation, the remaining prisoners at Stutthof are marched to the Baltic. Hundreds are forced into the water and shot. One of the survivors marries and immigrates to the United States. She vacations with her family every year at the beach.
 
untramped
in the snow                  she walks by the sea
purple crocus               washing the sand from her feet
                                   
Sonic Boom April 2018


​This haibun is one of my poems in my collection of holocaust poetry. I hope to publish them one day, but I feel that there are more to come. I write about the holocaust because it is a story, or should I say millions of stories, waiting to be told and remembered. It was a time of great suffering and fear. A time like no other in modern history. Ultimately a time of triumph, of good over evil. We would do well to remember. As a believer, I see it as a historical marker, a moment in time, from which the modern state of Israel was reborn. A prophecy fulfilled which will usher in a new Kingdom. One in which there are no more tears and no more dying.

​"And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, Look! God's dwelling place is now among the people, and he will dwell with them. They will be his people, and God himself will be with them and be their God. He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away." 
​Revelation 21: 3-4 (NIV)

 
Coming back different
 
They found him behind the drapes in the living room hiding from the commies--
 
We follow the nurse down the long corridor at the VA Hospital where Uncle Herb lives. My shoes squeak on the white-tile floor.  As we enter the visitor’s area the nurse locks the doors behind us. I wonder if she will remember to let us out.
                                   
snow--
so many colors
of camouflage
 
Uncle Herb is staying with us for the weekend. I start to laugh when he sings White Christmas. He sounds just like Bing Crosby. I think he forgot to take his medicine though, because he’s talking non-stop again about his perpetual-motion machine. Dad tells him it won’t work but Uncle Herb won’t listen. He just keeps talking and they keep going round and round.
 
subway train
he checks his pocket
for another nickel
 
The music is loud at Lois’s wedding reception. Various aunts, uncles, nieces, and nephews are celebrating, including Uncle Herb. The DJ is playing Devo and we are all out on the floor dancing. Lois succeeds in convincing Uncle Herb to join us. On a good day he does a pretty mean Freddie.
 
birdsong…
rapid fire of machine guns
in a distant field
 
It would have been enough that you survived Korea, the psychiatrists, all the Thorazine they pumped into you, the weekend passes, the group homes, and us. But those awards—the ones they found in your room—for the thousands of hours you spent taking care of the patients at the VA. How did you do it? We thought you were just drinking coffee, at McDonald’s, with your friends. Seems you had a little bit more in mind. Oohrah!
 
the old lot
between the cracks
daffodil blooms
 
 
 
For my Uncle Herb...you "whipped it good!"